Maybe I got spoiled when my kids were little. Maybe I just have a false perception of what Mother’s Day really is…..
or maybe, Mother’s Day isn’t really for mothers. Maybe it’s for kids. Yes, that is what I think. Mother’s Day is not really for us mothers…it’s for us kids.
You see, for as long as I can remember Mother’s Day has been a day in the year that I, as a child of a mother, have looked forward to. Why? Because I get to show how great I am. I think this is a universally known fact: kids want to be known as “the best kid” so they draw the pictures, make the cards, make breakfast , clean their rooms, dress themselves(in mis-matched clothes) and show off their incredibly awesome talents of picking up and doing “mom’s chores” . We, the children of the world, are self-absorbed and sort of hungry for attention and validation. I’m sure there must be a psychiatrist out there who has studied this phenomenon.
My own little munchkins have lavished their love upon me year after year with cards and poems, pictures and crafts, treats and flowers and always hugs and kisses. Well, they did. They did up until they apparently saw through all the schmoozing and the placating. I must have failed. I guess I didn’t thank them adequately enough. My “oh my’s” and “thanks sweetie” and “you’re the best kids ever” comments have obviously not been convincing enough. Most kids wait for the pay -off. They love their moms, of that I’m sure. They adore her wit and humour, her baking and cooking, her cuddles and love. Of course, I would never say otherwise! But let’s get real…the kids are going for the payoff, the reward, the smile, the hug and even the tears. Hey, if you can make your mother cry on Mother’s Day, you just hit a payload of world’s best kid for the next several months. You can do no wrong! (I am so rolling my eyes right now).
Maybe I’m just a bit cynical or maybe I’m just seeing through it all but Mother’s Day isn’t all it’s cracked up to be. When I had my first child, Mother’s Day was incredibly special. But, I was nauseous….I was pregnant with number 2! My second Mother’s Day was spent with a toddler and a baby. My husband was great about making sure we went out to lunch and I do believe that was the year we went out with both of our mothers(never happened since!). The next few years were great too~ hubby gave me the day off. (HA). Ya right. He made lunch or took me out, I got flowers and maybe a small token or card but really, a day off? There is no such thing! When you have babies and toddlers Mother’s Day is just another MOTHER day. You wipe the snot, clean up the poop, feed the baby, wipe the tears, treat the sick and wounded and do the dishes. That’s okay. On Mother’s day, I am still a mother. And on Father’s Day…I’m a mother too!
There is a false perception that women ought not to lift a finger on Mother’s Day. We should be pampered and waited on. Hey, that would be nice any day of the year..why wait till May?! So, yesterday, I celebrated this special day with my Grandma. She is the mother of many. She is an inspiration and my hero. But I didn’t get her a card and I didn’t get a card(more on that later). I don’t mind. It isn’t about the cards and the flowers. It’s about the kids. Having kids is what makes you appreciate what your own mother went through. Having kids also makes you realize what a pain in the butt you were. Being a kid(as we all are) is what Mother’s Day is all about. We kids are the reason our mothers have a day to celebrate.
And after all was said and done, my 2 youngest gave me cards they made and my 2 oldest posted “Happy Mother’s Day” on my FB wall. Because that’s what kids do. And no, they didn’t do the dishes(till I guilted them into it). And no, I didn’t have peace and harmony, smelly flowers, sappy words and silly gifts. At the end of the day, I had my kids. And that’s what Mother’s Day is all about~ kids.
**author’s note: if any of my children read this, for next year’s Mother’s Day, could I have ONE day of no fighting, no trips to the ER, no homework crises, no school forms to fill out, no conversations about responsibility and respect, no emotional breakdowns about how hard your life is, no messy rooms and for crying out loud~ could I have a nap with NO background noise? Thanks..in advance. You’re the BEST! **