Interesting that we’ve moved from a place called “High Prairie” to THE PRAIRIES. What’s the difference? I’m finding out.
First of all, on the “real” prairies there are animals like gophers, antelope and skunks. High Prairie has none of these due to the high population of predators like coyotes and wolves. Secondly, there are pests on THE Prairies like crickets and grasshoppers which we do have in High Prairie but not in such high amounts and not nearly as destructve. Today, I got out the Doktor Doom(that is the REAL name on the can) Cockroach and pest killer and there has now been a masacre.
My husband and all of his beaver hunting in High Prairie cannot possibly compete with the murderous excursion that I just had. His 30-0-6 rifle is no match for these critters. I sprayed, I waited and I watched. Dozens of scurrying , panicked crickets came teaming out from under the patio blocks and rocks and soon began to convulse and flip onto their backs until they moved no more. It was quite entertaining and somewhat satisfying. You may think I am cold blooded and evil. Let me tell you something, these critters are horrible and the destruction they can do is monumental compared to my little trist with instecticide.
So, that little bit of information was nauseatingly boring…unless you’re ME and you have to know what you’re dealing with.
Where were we? Oh yes, the PRAIRIES!
Out here on the REAL prairies, there’s a slight obsession with football. And by slight, I mean these people have issues. We’re in this little town that is competing with 5 other much BIGGER towns for the title of Riderville. I will have to save an entire post for this because you will absolutely not believe what is going on here. Anyhow, my non-athletic, computer geek, get-me-in-front-of-a-screen son was singled out in a hallway and told to come to football practise yesterday. He did and tomorrow he leaves for his first game 3 hours away. WHAT????????!!!! All of the sudden I am Sandra Bullock(oh ya, you know I am), out there on the field saying” You mess with MY son, you mess with ME”. Cause that’s just how I roll.
#4: Prairie air is thinner….did you know? It is, in fact, causing light-headed dillusions in me and my daughter. We’re having a bit of a hard time with headaches and I’m hoping it wears off soon because it’s cramping my style.
#5: Out here on the prairies, crime is apparently not that big of an issue. Or if it is, they’re keeping it well hidden. Take , for example, this REAL ad that I read in the REAL newspaper here this week. This is word for word, with quotes as written:
LOST: Would the person seen “borrowing” my blue and white 90cc Panterra Motorcycle from the back yard on 7th Ave. West please return it or at least call 228-*&^ and tell me where to find it. No response will result in further actions taken to retrieve it.
Or this fine Crimestoppers Report on the 4th page(this is all there was-for real):
Mischief to Property: Sometime overnight on Monday, August 16th or Tuesday, August 17, a barbeque was vandalized at a residence in Unity, Sask. Anyone with information regarding this incident is asked to contact the local RCMP. Callers do not have to leave their names and will not haveto testify in court.
Between someone “borrowing” a motorcycle and the vandalism of BBQ I’m just wondering what sort of community we’ve moved to?
6: On the prairies, there are few trees. So, this poses a bit of a problem if you want to have a wood-burning fireplace. But what is the saying? Necessity is the mother of invention and invent they have done!! These crafty people have designed and developed grain-burning stoves! And we have one! Apparently, we can trek on down to the local grain elevator and sweep up some leftovers on the floor and have enough grain, flax, rye or corn to heat our entire house for a month!
Are you intrigued? Are you convinced? Does it entice you at all? I thought so~ and that’s what prairie air can do.