Okay, okay. I know that typically you get my warm and fuzzy positive motivational posts. But not today. Today, I am moody. I’ve already snapped at my husband once, snapped at a kid and the day is only half over. Oh dear.
Moving has been hard. This move has had its own unique set of challenges which I have posted in previous blog-posts.
But today, as I look out on the blowing snow, the cold wind smacking me in the face I wonder how we got here. I wonder how in the world we’re going to make it work. I know that January on the prairies is hard. The winter is harsh and unrelenting. The days are dark and dreary for the most part. There isn’t much to look forward to and even the school calendar doesn’t seem to offer any redemption or time to breathe.
My husband is not working, there is little to no work. Our van is in need of some serious repairs. The business truck is falling apart. We’re rapidly depleting the reserve fund and there doesn’t seem to be a light at the end of this dark tunnel. Then there’s the paperwork~ switching insurance, healthcare, licenses, vehicle inspections and more.. we’re only part way through the process.
My kids are adjusting, but none of us are “happy”. What is happy? What makes a person truly happy on the inside, so much so that they exude gleeful delight on the outside? Where does that come from? How do people, in spite of their pain and their disappointments find the joy?
I’m asking myself and I’m asking God. I don’t claim to have all the answers, but He does. And yet, even sometimes when I think I know what He’s thinking, I really don’t. I don’t get it and I’m getting tired and worn.
Tomorrow is a new day. Thank God for that.
But today I am moody. Let me have my mood today and I promise, tomorrow will be better.