I was 19. I had never been courted or wooed. Yes, I had been in love(well, whatever “in love” means when you’re a teenager”) but I had never been pursued, or loved by a man. My outfit of choice for this momentous occasion: a purple rayon top with the loudest purple/floral balloon pants. Yes, it was 1991. My long, wavy hair pinned back in a single barrette.
He was 19 also. He had pursued many girls, but never a woman(haha). He was wearing his grey acid wash jeans and his grey cowboy boots. They were his casual dress clothes. He was nervous. He came with a single long stemmed pink rose.
We drove to The Keg. The line up was long so we left. Driving down Albert Street we finally settled upon our dinner destination: Swiss Chalet. We ate, we talked, we laughed. Later we went to the house of a friend where several other friends had gathered. I’m sure my flushed cheeks and the awkwardness of the evening was not lost on all who saw us. We were young and we were intentional. This was the beginning of the rest of our lives.
Our first date, Friday March 15, 1991 is a significant moment in my life. I remember everything about that day, the days that lead up to it and the weeks that followed. Isn’t that what a first date should be? Significant?
I was never one to date for the sake of dating. To me, dating has always been for the sole purpose of finding a mate for life. It is not a recreational game. Emotions are fragile. Feelings run deep.
My heart skipped a beat the morning before when I woke up and left for work at 4 in the morning. On my windshield, pinned beneath the wiper blade, was a piece of paper. A note. I still have it. ” A certain synthesizer player requests the honour of your presence at supper on Friday night. If you choose to accept, please call……” Isn’t that sweet? I could hardly breathe. The friend I had; the friend who had made me laugh, listened to me, prayed with me ~ he wanted to date me. There’s nothing better than having the respect and adoration of a friend. There is nothing as sweet as being pursued by that friend because he wants to see you more.
The milestones of dating:
March 22~ our hands fumbled and found the other’s…we never let go. Even now, the touch of his hand on mine sets my heart a fluttering.
March 30~ At a social event his hand, gently supporting the small of my back. What woman doesn’t love it when a man holds her so softly she could move away but why would she leave when he holds her like this?
April 6~ I couldn’t escape~ he had enough of the wait….the first kiss. I’m sure my lips were like a cold, dead fish! But that kiss~ it was tender and soft. Smooth and loving…
The days, the moments, the weeks of love blossoming. Springtime. Hands holding, lips kissing, laughing, talking, planning……loving. This is the way God intended it. A man chasing down his love, unrelenting. I am my beloved’s and he is mine.
All I wish for my children and for others is to have that same sweet touch . Wait for it. Be patient. Don’t rush the moments when love waits in the shadows. I only wanted to love and be loved. And the rest is history. We may not be the poster couple for a happily ever after, but we love deeply and we’re committed. Love is not easy. It requires the giving up of one’s self. Do not believe the hype that you have to be happy with yourself to find love. No, you simply need to give love. Give and you will receive.