Begin again. {Starting over and a new word for 2013}

The thing about turning over the last page of a calendar is you get to start over.  I love clean pages, empty notebooks, clear calendars.  They beg us to fill them but before that…..pause and just soak in the simplicity of nothing on the page.

January shouldn’t be the excuse or reason to make resolutions or goals, but it is.  Something about this time of year, after all the busyness of Christmas. Too much eating. Too much spending. Too many expectations. Pausing and refocusing on what matters is what makes January such an inviting month for clean slates. And so, I begin again……to think about what this blog is and what it isn’t.

I screw up. A lot. I engage in conversations and debates that I really should walk away from. I’m making big strides in not going there. But every once in a while a topic comes up that pulls me in .  And so, if you read my blog, I may post a recipe or some tips and tricks for kitchen happiness. But then, I might get political.  Isn’t that how it is with friends? We talk about our kids and our work and then we talk weather and sports. And very often we debate and disagree but we always laugh and hug and come back together again.  That’s what this blog is to me. A conversation.  (I wish it wasn’t so one-sided; you all need to comment more!)

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I took down our tree yesterday. I packed up those shiny balls and the pinecones.  I smile when I see them~ I will smile again in November when I pull them out from their storage hiding places.

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I can’t quite bring myself to take it all down though.  Especially this little nativity set that is so homely and unimpressive. Baby Jesus with His arms open wide is inviting and welcoming.  Joseph, with that chip on his shoulder from years ago. And Mary with her glazed over smile~unaware of what’s to come.

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I debated whether to continue writing at all. Does it even matter? I had an interesting year(and by interesting I mean awful) last year with my One Word: Redeemed.  I was all excited in January that the Lord might redeem the mess we were in financially and with our house not being sold.  But here we are in January one year later and the finances are worse for wear and the house is not yet sold.  Did anything get redeemed? Or what does that even mean? I’m still working on it. I never will understand or arrive at being redeemed until Jesus returns. If anything was redeemed, it was my attitude….still in process but so much better than it was a year ago.

So what is to be my one word? I pondered and prayed and lamented.  Story? New. Renew?  Maybe Freedom. Ya, that’s a good one.  Mercy, humble, justice, hope, moments…..WRITE.   None of it felt right and none of it encompassed all that I wanted to do.

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and then came……………THRIVE.  Yes. That’s what I want.  I don’t want to just live. Or survive.  I want every story, every hope, every dream, every recipe to make me step one inch closer to thriving in all that I do.  And so, that’s it.

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My goal this year is to do better tomorrow than I did today.  That’s it.  Losing weight would be nice.  Being debt free would be great. Spending more time in the Word would be awesome.  Making more time for friends~absolutely.  But I’m not going to get hung up on check lists and deadlines.  I just want to do better and do more with what I already have.  And in all of it….THRIVE.

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